Stuck In Reverse

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you don't sleep
Stuck in reverse

You must remember that lyric from Coldplay, yeah that was what I felt last week. The world of work has become so cut-throat and competitive that it's sometimes like riding up an escalator the wrong way. You can't ever relax. I was so uninspired by my job that there was a moment when I did nothing but cry. I made a huge dreadful, blunder at work. I realized I'd wasted two years whingeing instead of doing something about it. And climax was last Wednesday. I cried out loud and I was so ashamed of it.

And one of a good friend of mine, she's really kind & picked me up from the office and we went to a cafe I forgot the name something start with Belgian Waffle...I'll let you know again once I remember. It's such a cozy place, we order waffle with ice cream and we talked. Actually she insisted me to talk about what happened that night. She's really taught me one of the most valuable lessons of my life. Sweet friend who saved my day with simply said "Don't get so upset about it. The person who never made a mistake never made much either." Thanks mate, I felt instantly a bit better.

It remind me about an article about ballet dancers. They do a dance class every single day whether they're performing or not. It's to see which side they're "falling" when they do their turns, see what bits they're likely to stumble over so they can practise & practise, and put it right. Mistakes are part of getting it right.

I don't wanna be a person who said with flat face " Look guys, I screwed up. I'm a fool. But hey, I'm human too. Just like you." Just because I made a mistake doesn't mean I can't start over. I made pledge, I recommitted.