Sunday, August 26, 2012

On The Life I called Regret

Bunch of regrets. Mistake made, another one again.
I am undeniably dumb and never picked the right person.
Terrible judgment and being incapable of choosing right choices, those are all i am.

I realize that I was the subject to my own wild imagination, day dreams, fantastic fantasies, wishful thinking, false assumptions and fake pretences.
I let you rule my head when I very well know that the 'you' I knew doesn't exist anymore.
A beautiful, scintillating, bewitching and wonderful illusions metamorphose into bittersweet fragments of reality...
I am wasted. I am jaded. I am weak...weak because the cold, harsh, bitter winds of reality pierce me, cut me, strangle me.
Stupid me for thinking that I would not slip in puddles, never slide in mud-filled puddles and get dirt all over myself but I slip.
I slip and I crash and I fall. I am vulnerable, tearful, weak...

And I saw you...standing over there...laughing at me.
"Stop knocking on locked doors. Stop looking for lost treasures on lonely islands. Stop diving in a bottomless pit called lust. Just stop killing yourself with the past. Learn, dear, learn for you are the only one who suffers. Because there is no such thing as boring as staying." You said

But I never learn, didn't I?

And once again you win. A trophy. A token of my stupidity.
You...just insert the coin and I am becoming that girl who is familiar with pain and talk the language of sorrow fluently.


  1. you are the best person i know. Know this, if a person sitting in a country thousands of miles away knows you are strong and the most caring person ever then everyone who's even closer to you must know better.. else they never knew you at all. A hard "dont want to believe truth" but its true. Greatest people have made mistakes, god has made mistakes and regretted, and we are after all human. So don't fall, because you are guilty for one person in the world, what about the rest of the people who care about you more than that one person? do we hold no value?.. if we do care about us back and see how we all care about you more.

  2. Well thank you so much Geek boy. Best comment ever I heart you so much.