Sunday, August 7, 2011

Expectation is a Bitch.

She sat in front of PC, logged on to her messenger. She sighed "He's not online". She waited and hoped a green dot showed up beside his name. But after 15 mins waiting, nothing happened he didn't come out online, only silence. she kept looking to her PC screen, he promised he would be online but he broke his promise again like the other days. She got up. Left. Walked to the window. She stared out of the window, staring at the trees outside. The morning was so peaceful and she was alone, all alone. Alone with her thoughts, sometimes she got that so lonely feeling and it just makes sense for her to give up but she couldn't. She pondered about how her life gone by. Regret, failure, love fools her...many times but she never learned from it so she fell into same hole again and again. She was sad. Very, very sad. What was she thinking?

She walked to her bed and lied down her body.The weather was getting colder; she could feel it through her naked skin, and the fact that she had no blanket to cover her body made her mood even worse. She tried to close her eyes and then suddenly some of memories of things recalled. About how her life could have been something better. About so many small things she missed. About him. The feeling she had on her chest, something like it wanted to get out — it’s always like this when she's having him in her mind. How she felt it was just plain hard for her to breathe. How every tip of her body is aching for his presence. How she suddenly just couldn't stop thinking about him. She missed everything about spending quality times with him, even when it only includes random jokes and pointless chat.

But then again the fact that he wasn't here and maybe will never be here, she expect too much on him. That thing never happened for real. He was a part of a dream that never happened. Never. She knew it.

P.S. Pic isn't mine and I found it somewhere in Google I guess.

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